This week I'll be mostly the executioner

Game, set and match.

"Athletic with a fatal twist" is not what it says on the box, but it ought to.

When we moved into our current home, it had been empty for a while, so the spiders had already moved in. We spent a few weeks trapping them under cups, hoovering them up and whacking them with slippers. During the August nights we also had mosquitos to deal with, and now we're into September the crane-flies have started turning up.

So when I got sent The Executioner for my birthday, it turned out to be a revolutionary addition to the household anti-insect armoury. It's basically an electrified tennis racquet for swatting bugs with. So yes, it is "athletic with a fatal twist". You just press the button, do your best backhand smash at your pesky crane fly, there's a satisfying crackle, a final twitch of wings, and your bedroom is insect free again.

It's game, set and match for those insects.